Do you ever have days when that little voice in your head tells you things like, “You’re not good enough”, “Why are you even bothering?”, “What’s the point in trying?”, “Why try, you won’t succeed”.
Well, you definitely aren’t alone if you do. I understand how easy it is to take notice of those poisonous whispered words, and to truly start to believe them. It’s easy to be so convinced they are true that you start looking for “proof” that you aren’t good enough, that no one likes you, that you shouldn’t bother trying.
In the middle of all of this, it can be hard to remember that you are a unique, beautiful, intelligent person with so much to offer the world.
“You alone are enough. You have nothing to prove to anyone.” ~Maya Angelou
So, when that little snake-like voice is whispering in your ear, and the creeping tendrils of depression feel like they are squeezing around your heart, you need a plan of attack to remind yourself you are worthy. You are good enough.
Embrace Your Uniqueness
It’s very easy to compare yourself to anyone and everyone around you, but you are not them, and they are not you. And that is a wonderful thing. The world would be a dull place if everyone were the same, and it would be a sad place indeed without you in it.
The things that you worry about, that you think make you strange or different, are probably the very things that your friends and family love about you. Celebrate what sets you apart from others. Challenge your inner voice when it criticises you.
You Are Not Alone
When you’re in a tough place, or feeling down, it can often feel like you are the only person going through what you’re going through. Remember, everyone struggles and everyone feels sad sometimes. Life can be tough and it’s okay to find it hard.
Depression, anxiety, low self esteem, insecurity – all these things can feel lonely and isolating, and you can feel completely trapped inside your own head. Try reaching out to someone close to you. Even if you are convinced you aren’t good enough, they will be only too happy to show you how amazing you are.
Would You Say That to Your Best Friend?
Imagine your inner voice is you, and you are your best friend. What you talk to your best friend the way you talk to yourself? Absolutely not.
And if your best friend told you that s/he thought s/he wasn’t good enough, or was rubbish at everything, would you agree? No! You would be saddened that s/he was feeling that way, and would do everything you could to help them see the wonderful and talented person that you see.
What makes you so different from your best friend, that makes those horrible things you tell yourself true for you, and not for her/him? Nothing. That’s what.
Write Down Your Achievements/ Strengths
When you are feeling in a good place, try writing a list of all your achievements. Everything you feel proud of, your strengths, your best qualities. That way, when the inner critic pounces, you can get out your list, and remind yourself of all the good things you have done.
If you struggle to write this list in the first place, why not ask a friend or loved one to help you come up with some things. It will help to get an outsider’s unbiased view.
If you’ve been reading my blog for a while, you’ll know how interested I am in the power of gratitude. Keeping a gratitude journal, or simply giving thanks every morning, for whatever makes you happy and healthy is a really powerful tool for boosting your mood.
If you’re struggling with anxiety, or low self esteem, you can be blinded by your sense of unworthiness. Practising saying thank you for things – and really meaning it – will help you accept and believe it when people compliment you on something. This in turn will slowly help you to feel more self confident.
Connect With Nature
I’ve mentioned before how important it is to get outside into nature, and there is some good science to back this up. Connecting with nature helps you detach from your moment of overwhelm. It boosts your mood, makes you better able to cope with stress, and makes your feel more energetic and vibrant.
If you are feeling down, or stuck in a negative spiral, get outside and go for a walk in the park. Distance yourself from those negative thoughts for a while and it will help you gain some perspective.
Write Yourself a Love Note
One of the things I would most recommend to remind yourself you are good enough, is to write yourself a little self love note. Whatever it is that you most struggle with, write a positive affirmation that counters it on a bright post-it note (for example). Then, stick it up somewhere you will see it everyday – maybe the bathroom mirror, or a kitchen cupboard. Read that little note everyday, and you’ll be surprised at how helpful it can be in difficult moments.
I myself have one that simply says “You are enough”. It sits on my desk and I read it every morning.
You Are Good Enough
If you are really struggling though, do get in touch with a therapist. They can be really helpful in pinpointing the underlying issues that make you feel the way you do.
And remember to take care of yourself. Invest some time everyday to self care and self love, it is so important for your mental health. In fact, I’ve created a course which combines of exercise, meditation and healthy eating, helping you to take care of your body and mind. Sign up by using the form below and start feeling more confident. You deserve it: